Wow, expansion, what does it feel like????

When I began my journey on awakening to the truth of this Universe, I can say that expanding was not always what it was cracked up to be. I read lots of self-help and spiritual and even new age books. Yet, when I began, it only felt like my life was falling apart even more than what I had believed it to be.

Yet for some reason I had the fortitude to keep going. I am so very glad that I did. Throughout the years of the dedication that I gave myself, which I can only describe as a yearning even when I felt so bad, all I wanted was to give up. Really just give up the ghost so to speak and go back home.

Even then I truly only needed to put my head down for a little while and be cherished a little. It was that feeling of desperation that actually began my walk for internal solace. Even when people were trying to give me love, it felt inadequate, it was that feeling of inadequate that made me search long and hard about the self containment of the soul.

Just that term scared the bejesus out of me. I like to be touched, loved and share in those feelings and interactions with people on this earth. I did not want to become a loner. It was not and is not today my make-up to be without friends and family to nurture and be nurtured by.

So it took great courage on my part to really find out what this means… this self containment of the soul. Well, am I glad I did. It is not anything that I thought it was.

It is about the real understanding of accountability. Of first having responsibility to self. Not to lie to ourselves about our feelings. Not to do things out of obligation. That is when we let ourselves down. That is when we cross boundaries that tie us up and it is those actions that hurt our feelings.

Then we want to hold other people hostage about the feelings that we hurt in ourselves. It is once we take charge of this part of our lives, we really start to see just how we have always been in charge of our own feelings.

I am in no way saying that this is easy in the beginning. What I am saying is that once you begin this very quest in earnest, your life will change… and fast, for the better and in the joy that only is written about.

Very few can say they live in joy everyday. The quest is yours. Are you going to pick up the challenge? I am here. Let’s go together. We can leap-frog off each other.  Yes!!!!

2 thoughts on “Wow, expansion, what does it feel like????

  1. Wow – thank you for the reminder that about so easily falling into lying about our feelings, or doing things out of obligation. And thanks for the encouragement on taking charge of our feelings. I am on this very quest myself.

    I have already noticed that even focusing jut a little bit more on accountability and self-responsibility, I am already feeling more joy inside!!!

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