So, you are in a relationship, and you’re sharing a family, a home, and all the bills and money issues that go along with that kind of a relationship. In this relationship do you feel your happiness? Do you feel that the world is your oyster? The things that you dream about – are they all becoming a reality or are they getting pushed farther and farther back into that very messy closet where all those things you want to do some day but have not gotten to it as of yet are located?
There are two sides of a relationship that I have spoken about here. Some relationships might look like this:
The partner who feels that life is great and they get to do any and everything they desire. They are happy, they tell any and all what a fabulous relationship they have. They are truly blessed.
Then there is the other partner – do they feel it is as fabulous and great, do they feel they are always getting the things they desire? Or are they the one that, time and time again, gets to hold the bag that is ever so empty because partner number one has used up all the cool things for themselves.
We must look at both sides of the coin because really, the partner that does not feel like their needs are being met has allowed the partner that is doing just for themselves to dance along… because they do not want to make waves.
Yes, you heard me. Partner one is a bully and they are not being challenged in a way that they can see that whenever they are asked to look at all the things they do, they generally deflect the energy so that it is turned on to the partner trying to show that maybe, just maybe partner one should look again at what they are claiming is such a fabulous life.
When I say deflect, I mean they say things like, “Now come on, are we going to play tit for tat so I feel bad and do not do what I desire?” The truth is, if you as a partner are walking a path for learning and understanding the Universal Truth you missed your opportunity to get some growth.
How? When the sting came, about how much you are doing for yourself, you leaped and said, “What about you?” instead of looking at the emotions you feel about the statement made to you.
Are you taking time? Yes, you get to. We have to refresh and rejuvenate ourselves but you again must look at the fact that you made a choice to be in this kind of relationship. That means that there is a parameter that needs to be played in and you said you would.
Did you go to this partner and really talk about changing the parameter beforehand or did you just figure it is your life and you get to play it your way. This is how we are bullied from a very early age into crossing our boundaries and then wondering why, now as adults, we do not even notice when we are doing so time and time again.
P.S. I am back in the Simi Valley, CA area and would love to get together with you and a few of your friends if you’re in the area. If you might be interested in hosting a small gathering in your home let’s schedule it ASAP. More info HERE
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