The final change of what?
When you are learning what it means to simply make choices just for yourself, it seems to the people in your life that you are talking crazy. They already believe you do everything for yourself and wonder what you could possibly want now.
That is not what is truly meant when I use the phrase, “Self is Necessary”. What is truly meant by ‘doing things just for yourself’, is learning to recognize that when you are asked to do something, you need to sincerely consider whether the request is something you can and or feel like doing at that moment.
You have this feeling that happens the moment the question is asked. Yes, you do. Because you have spent your life walking over those feelings, those niggling feelings, you may have numbed yourself to them. You were probably taught to always do for others first. You simply had to bury the feeling. Why? Because of the anger you would have felt about having to do for someone else when you did not feel like it.
So when I remind you that “Self is Necessary” it is about finding that internal niggle, as I call it, and following only that. When you do that you are listening to your internal makeup which is your divine Godness, and it always knows what is best for you at any given time. This is one of the hardest things for you to get used to. You get to say “no”, simply because if it is not feeding your soul you will only get negative feedback anyway.
Notice how often you have negative feedback in your world when you are doing things now. How often have you found yourself asking yourself, “Well why did I do that? They did not appreciate it anyway, it was just a waste of my time.”
So you have already seen and felt this negative feedback, yet instead of simply having the knowing this was one of those times you simply needed to stand up and say, “No, sorry I can not do it today.”, you want to go and tell yourself some cockamamie story.
Who are you going to use as your scapegoat this time? Your spouse, your children, your parents, your boss, your siblings? You should simply look at: ‘Well, this is one time I should have gone by that very quick feeling that is located right in my heart area that said either – ‘Yes lets go for it’, or ‘No not today’. Your answer is only for that one time. You are, and always will be, directed each and every time a decision is needed.
Once you get used to that feeling happening, you will find your life starts getting easier and you will not feel used and abused.
I would like to talk about respect. How easy is it if you do not respect yourself enough to say, “Yes, I do not mind participating today” or “No, that won’t work for me today”? If you don’t respect yourself that much then no one else will respect your choices when you need time for yourself.
So, are you seeing people being disrespectful to you even though you would think that everyone should see when to have common courtesies? Once again, until you are honest with and about yourself, no one else will be. It would take a highly integral person that would not allow you to cross your integrity to have you do something they would like you to do for them…
Do you know any such person? Or do you mostly know those people who, like you, feel that you should do unto others first whether you have the time and the true love to do so or not?
Feel free to share your comments about your experiences!
P.S. I am back in the Western WI/Twin Cities MN area and would love to get together with you and a few of your friends if you’re in the area. If you might be interested in hosting a small gathering in your home let’s schedule it ASAP. More info HERE
I also offer personal One on One sessions. These are hour long private sessions in which you privately meet with me by phone to ask questions, gain clarity and receive guidance. It’s like your very own ‘personal teleseminar’!
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