I have been watching and working with couples and I often see when people have stories that have been with them about how they feel about their life before they met the person they choose to share their life with. I hear from both sides how they assume that the other person is the one that should give validation of the things they do in the Universe called their life. I have heard how they share how they would comply with the wishes with the other as though they really cared yet then proceeded to talk the other one into the real way they wanted things to go.
This is not the spiritual way of doing things. Once again, as a Being wanting to walk in the truth of the Universe one must learn how to hear these things without getting angry with the other person, but how to talk to yourself so you are not setting yourself up for hurt feelings.
For instance… say your partner has a huge job to do at work and it will of course benefit the entire family. So you decide to take over much of the choices and decisions that are part of your normal life. You do not talk about the fact that you are doing so and how does your partner feel about the choice you are making, yet when it is all over you would like a simple thank you. That seems appropriate right? Well can you see where you made choices without asking or communicating what you were planning to do?
So then why is it your partners accountability to thank you for walking over their boundaries without communicating that you were going to do so? Would you appreciate if they did that sort of thing for you? What if some of the choices that you made were made only from your point of view and did not fit your partners ? Hmm… yet you desire to be thanked for all the things you have done.
I hope you are beginning to see how easy it is to walk over someone’s boundaries with the best intentions on your part. Yet if and when your partner tries to share you go into the emotions of all you have done and how you are never appreciated… yet are you allowing your partner to really share their feelings, hurt or otherwise, because you are still sitting in the story that you have done everything with your partner in mind.
Communications is the key here.
To start with your internal heart to make sure you are not making choices from old stories that you wrote for yourself without a Guardian to walk you little heart through what has happened. So you can see that you made a choice that put you in a position that led to the life experience. Do you see where communication is the key to freedom of self? If you would have communicated from the very beginning to yourself about the choices you have been making you would not find yourself today wanting someone else to validate that the choices you are making today are okay for you. You would be communicating in a way that you always, with each and every breath, will be validating your own life for your own choices.
P.S. I am currently in the Twin Cities, MN/WI area and would love to get together with you and a few of your friends if you’re in the area. If you might be interested in hosting a small gathering in your home let’s schedule it ASAP. More info HERE
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