That is quite a statement I just made, yet if you can begin to tell yourself the true feelings and thoughts that you are having about any scenario in your life you are unhappy about, you will begin to hear where you are stopping yourself dead in your tracks. As well as you will begin to see where you are still afraid to make movement forward, even though you are saying you are.
Begin to understand that in the beginning making changes from the heart is never on the mark. Why you ask? Because you have learned behaviors that were put into place to protect your heart. The first time you used them ( I use the term safety net) you did so because you did not feel you were able to stand up for your true need. It does not matter how old you were at the time. You have so many learned behaviors that you must begin to take stock that in the beginning it will simply be the one that is sabotaging you right now. Then you will be able to take a look at how one learned behavior leads into and supports another until they are so entangled they become one really big one. The good thing is that once you start looking for them you can unravel them in your intellect. It will take much focus on your part though not to naturally fall into them as you are beginning to make new choices .
Don’t give up on your self though. Because when you are beginning to see them, even after the fact, means you are actually knowing what ways you fall into them which means you can then begin to see in what scenarios, and who you are interacting with, that trigger you into the protective mode of the learned behavior. This is the reason that you can bring in new people to play with in your world and still have the same outcome. Because you have a learned behavior that you are on auto pilot with and so you make the same kind of choices even though you are now with different people.
When you become aware again it is your accountability to take steps counter to your learned behavior not the other person. So learn about them, see how they are now getting in your way and not the protection that you thought they were when you decided to learn them in the first place.
Please be the one that says, ‘It was telling me in the first place not to make that decision.’ A safety net is always, always put into place because you do not want to make the right decision. The right decision would be to make the change. Instead you make excuses to yourself and say “It is too hard. I do not want to hurt those people I am interacting with.” You forget to put your soul on the scale and say, “Why do I want to hurt myself? Why do I put others on my scale and do for them what I will not do for myself?”
P.S. I am currently in the Toledo, OH area and would love to get together with you and a few of your friends if you’re in the area. If you might be interested in hosting a small gathering in your home let’s schedule it ASAP. More info HERE
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